Saturday, 24 March 2012

In our time

It is often rarely said, in Abati-cwm-hir, that after 43 and a quarter, a man becomes responsible for his face. Shrunken-headed sable spiricreative-framed corvine aspic-trampoline sad-balloon-after-the-party -face, Melvyn 'Black eyes' Bragg, disagrees. And he's very clever, like Stephen Fry. If you think knowledge = clever. Wiki-clever then. Malheureusement, as they say in the land where the state owns your face, the good lord saw unfit to bless me with genius. However, I do have a friend he preferred. Actually more an acquaintance. But just because you can't see him, doesn't mean he isn't there. In fact, by the magic of lying, they're both here now. Him and Bragg. And this time, by George North, I'm ready for him. You watch this:-

Dr.B:- *Peep! Pee -

REJ:- *Dart! * -

Dr.B:- *Poop! * -

REJ:- Bagged him! That should slow him down a bit. Ok, off you go Melvyn. In your own time -

MB:- Ever since civilisation began, but 500 million years after ants invented agriculture, people have believed in many gods, one god, or none. All of these are respectable positions. Super reasons in fact. But reason is not the primary source of knowledge -

REJ:- R-E-S-P-E-C-T! God knows what it means to he! - Honour killing fantasy, rape 'em first - their fault you see - uh-huh! just a little bit - uh huh! just a little -

Dr.B:- You did tell him I'm not a medical doctor? -

REJ:- Just be grateful I didn't let Delia in -

MB:- We start with emotions, and passions and feeling, the roots of which we don't know, and perhaps never will know -

Dr.B:- Well, they're in heads -

MB:- Things come to us outside the realms of reason, intimations of love, surprise by joy, little pulses that we don't know where they come from, we don't know where they lead to, but they satisfy us or they make us despair -

Dr.B:- They come from heads, Melvyn. You see if I remove your head -

REJ:- Bit crude, Dr.B, bit crude -

Dr.B:- Ok, if I remove part of your head -

REJ:- Now, now, we spoke about this sort of thing -

Dr.B:- Alright, if I look at someone without these pulses, and note which parts of their head are kaput, or absent, - that's where they come from. -

MB:- Perhaps we'll never know -

Dr.B:- Look I just fucking told you -

REJ:- Mae'n ddrwg gen I, Melvyn bach!, I think I got the dose wrong. Let me just play Dr.Nick again.....*Dart! * -

Dr.B:- Oooh!.....Smooth! I love you Melvyn -

MB:- Perhaps we'll never know -

Dr.B:- I'm feeling the pulses baby!.....mmmmmm!'ve got lovely legs, Melvyn. Has anyone ever told you that? -

REJ:- Sorri!, Sorri! More of an art at the moment, as you say -

MB:- You're not so bad-looking yourself, Dr.B. Perhaps I don't know exactly why I think so, but ever since civilisation began -

Dr.B:- You've got lovely, strokeable hair -

MB:- Yes, I know - *Stroke! *- mmmmm! - Do you want a go? -

REJ:- Mounting Probable! Not before you're married! And you can't get married. Because we are respecting religion, as you so wisely prescribe, Mr. Bragg. Now when a Ugandan queer is strung up, I think we can all respect that. And when an albino witch is burnt, I think again, there is consensus in this room. But what if the mysterious pulses ever manifested in a silly idea? Or even a nasty one? Must we respect that also? -

MB:- Lacking a primary source of knowledge other than pulses -

Dr.B:- I've gone off him -

REJ:- He could be a dull as fuck cunt, after all. Never mind. -

MB:- Thankyou for downloading this podcast -

REJ:- *Delete *

Tuesday, 20 March 2012

Adiel ben Schmucknosher

Tiananmen square, Tiananmen square,
When Google is yellow, the square is not there.

Nawrte, everybody hates Google, but I've always said hypocrisy should not apply to me. Circles my arse. It is hard to face Mecca on a sphere. But mineral rights are straight down. Fish don't move, and we should privatise the weather. Underneath Afghanistan are vast resources of China. But I'm getting ahead of yourself. Now don't blame me, I just read them out. Anyway, always keen to help, I was busy removing Mari Nicesmile Warmhands' homeopathy leaflets from the llyfrgell - thus making it her strongest advertising campaign yet - when, - and you won't believe this - I bumped into Adiel ben Schmucknosher, transzoological mohel, himself. Yes. Croeso i Lanfihangel-y-creuddun, Adiel ben Schmucknosher himself, I said, and he replied -

ABS:- I haven't read Pinker -

REJ:- Da iawn. Nawrte, we haven't any Jews - whatever they are - in Llanfihangel-y-creuddun, that's why there are never any fights. Unless you count the occasional fight. 11.05 outside the Llew Coch. Pob nos. Slightly more when Wales win, as the testosterone is remotely -

ABS:- How do you know? -

REJ:- Wel, I can hear them. Then I sneak out and watch for a bit. It's very exciting. They disgust me! Animals! Why, I'd like to bang their heads together. And then punch them a bit. Maybe slowly tighten a noose around -

ABS:- How do you know you haven't any, if you don't know what one is? -

REJ:- Aha! You've got me there boyo! And you have to get out of the clay pretty early to get one over on me. Yes indeed. So you'll have to tell me then. Can anyone be a Jew, or is it just bad luck? -

ABS:- Anyone can! The big nose and myopia is not compulsory at all -

REJ:- I thought they were just John Lennon fans. Imagine no's easy if you're an exorcist -

ABS:- Well no, Richard, they're not a race, they're more a people. In fact, some modern scientists have even ventured so far as to suggest they are, in some cases, actually people -

REJ:- Yes, Wel, We had to wait for Venter. And he had to wait for Collins. Although I wouldn't bother so much with the human biome, since a gene is a contrast, with the biome expression inherent. But I'm sure it will be useful elsewhere -

ABS:- It is completely optional. You can chose to be chosen. Yahweh's really not that fussy -

REJ:- Oooh! What's in it for me? -

ABS:- Saturday's off, a silly hat, and a ticket to paradise. I think we can skip the ringlets in your case -

REJ:- How does the ticket to paradise work? -

ABS:- By rail, mostly. Fourth class, but it's more about the destination, I always say -

REJ:- Sold! and do I get to run Hollywood? -

ABS:- Yes, yes! - all that! - run the banks, fake the moon landing, hide people's odd socks etc. All that comes with it. It's supposed to be a secret, but somehow the truth always gets out on the internet -

REJ:- Sign me up! Sign me up! Wait til Sioned hears about this! This will more than make up for that broadphonelectricgasband deal she won't shut up about. Just 18 months left. Hmmm....will I be able to dance with a bottle on my head? -

ABS:- I expect so -

REJ:- That's good, because when I tried to be a Cossack -

ABS:- Your knees -

REJ:- How did you know? -

ABS:- Just something about you told me -

REJ:- Wel, never mind, just get on with it. What do I do? I expect there'll be some chants and wails, some rocking back and forth like an autistic haven't, some sacrificial arabs, - that sort of thing -

ABS:- Oh, there'll be wailing and rocking alright. Be worse than you watching the rygby -

REJ:- But first! tell me just what exactly is a transzoological mohel? -

ABS:- Matthew, Mark, Luke & John, - all made-up - pass me your schlong! -

REJ:- er -

ABS:- I know. Not a very good rhyme if God wrote it. But translating poetry's always difficult. Now it was revealed to me, like a glistening blood-stained baby glans I sucked off, quite reasonably I thought, while family and friends clapped, that the biggest drawback in Africa is an elephant's foreskin -

REJ:- It's nice you had the clap -

ABS:- Now as I'm sure you are aware, God has had three ghost-written international best-sellers. Because that's the sort of thing Gods do. But only one is correct. It's not quite perfectly correct though, and that means we get to have different kinds of Jew, all differently chosen. It occurred to me, whilst staring inanely at a candelabra that would embarass Liberace, that I should go forth and mark the flesh of some of all of God's creation. Namely, all the ones with cocks -

REJ:- With you so far -

ABS:- I would hope so. It's not a particularly difficult argument to follow. Do an Israel joke -

REJ:- Israel.

ABS:- Yes it isn't democratic, because the majority of the donor populations don't vote. Bit late now really. But we weren't doing silly ideas. We were doing transzoological genital mutilation. Now the biggest cocks are found -

REJ:- Whales! -

ABS:- We heard you. And saw it coming a page ago. But we did hope -

REJ:- You're new here, aren't you? Some hope. Mind you, mein Jew, nihilism is pointless -

ABS:- Can I tell you about the rhinocerous I initiated? -

REJ:- Talk to the wall. I've got to go and kill some Persianians. I mean, if Uncle Tombama says so. He watches snuff movies in public, with pride, so I think we should do what he says instead.

Saturday, 17 March 2012

Poem for the day

Jesus Iesu Mawr Grist! Perhaps 'bumbling taffy twat' was a bit harsh for our Rowan. The fuckwit gurning imbecile. If only he had some sort of common reference point, some sort of coherent manual, then schism could be avoided. Wel, the good news from CERN is that neutrinos no longer travel faster than light, thanks to 'a new technique' in pressing the stopwatch. Sioned says it's as useful as Anne Frank's drumkit – whatever that means – and indeed I can't ask her for you, as she has had to pop out to her new pubic-macrame class, down the Merched-y-Wawr. The last of the Mohicans. I expect I'll find out later why they didn't last. Nawrte, nothing never existed, and continues to not-exist to this day. But it's always better to talk to people 'within revelation', as if we were conscious sort of thing. Helo, who's this? -

Idris ?:- I don't know, because you haven't done the archive properly yet. All I remember is that I'm the one who likes insects -

REJ:- Who doesn't?, Idris whatsyoursurname, who doesn't indeed! -

Idris ?:- And I've got a little joke for you -

REJ:- Just do the pome -

Idris ?:- An ant walks into a bar -

REJ:- Why? Why Idris? -

Idris ?:- I think my Mam was fond of the name -

REJ:- No why did the ant walk into the bar? -

Idris ?:- I was coming to that -

REJ:- Wel, have you got there yet? -

Idris ?:- Wel it's thirsty, isn't it? -

REJ:- I don't know, Idris, I've no idea! I've never met this ant. Can't you just do the poem? Be cheaper if it went down the SPAR -

Idris ?:- Good God m'n, you can't have ants down the SPAR can you? -

REJ:- * answer removed on legal advice * 

Idris ?:- And the ant says to the aphid, have you got a match? -

REJ:- Hmmm.....interesting. Why does the ant want a match? -

Idris ?:- I don't know, he never said -

REJ:- Wel, maybe it was dark -

Idris ?:- No, I don't think it was dark - 

REJ:- Wel, maybe it was after having a fag - 'smygu y mwg drwg -

Idris ?:- Look he never said! He never said why! He just wanted a fucking match -

REJ:- No, Idris whoeveryouare bach, ants don't just want matches. There must be a reason. And if you ask me, it's very suspicious. Very suspicious indeed. Yes. An ant asking for a match. Did no one think to ask why? Was it a worker or a soldier? -

Idris ?:- I'm not sure, a worker I think -

REJ:- Was it red or black? -

Idris ?:- Neither. Both. Look it doesn't matter -

REJ:- Oooh Idris! Forgive me, but I think you're being a little bit naïve there isn't it? Don't you? Yes indeed to goodness Iesu Mawr ofnadwy. It could have repercussions. It could -

Idris ?:- And the aphid says 'Your face, my arse' -

REJ:- I hope Priestland keeps it together for the big match. He's got the sneezes of the kneeses, as they say  in Cnwch-y-Craig. You see, he's red. Makes a difference, doesn't it? Now when Carwyn's red sosbans   beat the all blacks in -

Idris ?:- You didn't get it did you? -

REJ:- Yes I did! I got the DVD -

Idris ?:-

You are old, Father Time, the young man said
And your hands are all withered and worn
And yet you incessantly tick in my head
Do you think I am older than born?

In my youth, said the age, I was faster than still
And that was what slowered the pace
Then now you are seven from dusk until dawn
As your cells we repletely replace

You are young, Father Time, the old man said
And your hands are as smooth as a feel
And yet you unwind with a tock and I'm dead
As the cotton escapes from the reel

In my age, moment said, I was slow like a brick
And I sank to the sands of the sea
With my will I endowed coral kingdoms so bled
Til the last of my physics was free

You are middle-aged, Father -

REJ:- * trapdoor!* There is a limit you know -

Thursday, 15 March 2012

The Many Super Reasons to Pretend in God

From the tooth and claw of the Savannah, to the playing fields at Oundle, 'survival of the shrillest' has moulded the evolution of the New Atheists. But has their militant stridency blinded us to the many super reasons to pretend in God? Have we perhaps missed the nuanced insights of our cruciphiliac friends? Have we overlooked the genius of sophisticated feelogians such as D'Souza and WLC and that bumbling taffy twat? Let us consider now the many super reasons to pretend in God:-

1) The Somethingfromnothing and the genocide handbook

It must be hard to bother to make something from nothing, especially when there are no laws of Physics to prevent it happening without you. -1+1 is a tricky sum requiring a supernatural magic mind beyond our comprehension. What then if your fingers were invisible? If you couldn't see your hands? Why then even a book would be difficult to make. Not that it wasn't a super idea, to make a book when you can speak directly into people's minds – the whole world at once! - to make a book when no one can read? It was a super idea, and you could have managed it, but dictator seemed more your natural role.

2) The miracle of Life

Life from non-life takes scientists many hours, yet you needed only 1 god-day to do it! And you made more than a mere cell, which doesn't count at all. You made all the beasts of the land and the fishes of the sea. Each one sub-optimal even within the laws of physics and improvable with a moment's thought, but nonetheless a super day's work. And fun too! You know – when the teeth go in the zebra! When the worm goes in the eye! 0.01% species success rate! Although so far everything's died.

3) Absolute Morality and Forgiveness

Imagine life without God's absolute morality standard that lets us say torturing children is right! Without the God-given logic and morality that tells us torturing children to death with gruesome incurable diseases is a good thing! Why we wouldn't know what to think! And the blessing of forgiveness. No sin can't be forgiven – with God all is permissable – retrospectively! How would the priests have forgiven themselves on the choirboys without God's blessing? And the bombers on the planes – how would they have forgiven themselves?

4) The fine-tuning and the not-bothering with the ontological

How fine to be so magnificently tuned for decay and death. And those constants. Why, if one changed by absolutely any amount, the others adjusted would give the same result. And what a result! Not quite as good for life as it could have been, even without magic. And of course, with beings able to exist immaterially, there was never any need for material anyway. But perhaps you omnisciently forgot you could exist.

5) Pretending it real and the Hitler/Stalin/Mao

If we go through 'Mein Kampf' striking out 'God' and replacing it with 'Darwin' then that makes it real. But are silly ideas always silly? I don't know – I'm mutilating my children's genitals! Is too much critical thought and not enough blindly following holy orders a bad thing? What if I heard a voice telling me to sacrifice my son? Why without God I may as well just ignore it! If History teaches us anything it is surely that too much rational enquiry and not enough belief in silly ideas has been the problem. Hitler! Stalin! Mao! Pol Pot! The other one! Too much clear thinking and not enough faith! Too much rational enquiry and not enough dressing-up! Not enough belief that they were right in spite of the evidence! Pretending it real! This is surely what God wants us to teach children and people who can't think very well.

6) Heaven and hell

We all yearn to go to heaven and meet God. Perhaps you are the indoors type who likes harps and angels and dreary organ music, or perhaps you are the outdoors type who prefers fields and badly drawn tigers – like the Jehovah's Witnesses. There is something for everyone! Everything is perfect like it would be back home if His representatives had a bit more of the Earth-money God needs! And don't they do an efficient job? Hardly a penny left for palaces! But perhaps the most super reason of all the super reasons to pretend in God is our blessed deliverance from Earthly worries. War, famine, disease and suffering, death itself – these are difficult problems to face with reason alone. And though we might eat of the fruit of the tree of knowledge and become as Gods attempt to solve these troubles, how much better to instead turn the other way and face upwards, wailing to an empty sky?

REJ is away. Trying to work out how to do an index. Anyway, the FT's new.

Sunday, 11 March 2012


Wel, another day, another pound. There's just too many stray dogs. Or I could have said I was getting heavier. As thoughts weighed on my mind. Or I could have just whacked off. Wel, all those are true, and so heddiw let's do the economics. With me today are twoeconomistsagreeing, on account of I have made them up, and maybe someone else later - I haven't seen the end yet. Hang on, I'll scroll down...aha! interesting. Hmmm. No, I won't say. Whodunnit on page 1? Dear God! try mysterious for once.

Now since real economics is boring, I'm going to make it up. Let's pretend we have a closed system. Bound by Space perhaps. Some sort of intragalactic protectionist isolationist state. We'll include the bits of the Sun that get here. Now a quick check of resources. Earth + Sun. Near enough. For now anyway. That's enough Physics.

Now - I like saying now - we'll need some definitions. How about one for wealth creation? wel, a wealth creator would be someone who can make Earths and Suns. And work is distress to the organism. The rest is play. But I digest. Let's play on, and bid a notreallyinterested Llanfihangel-yr-Creuddun croseso i Llanfihangel-yr-Creuddun i twoeconomistsagreeing. Croeso. I Llanfi -

2ea:- Hey we could have a slightly staggered font -

REJ:- You're not here to be clever -

2ea:- Ok let's start with the basics. If GDP quintruples, but population doubles, what does that mean? -

REJ:- I must work harder -

2ea:- That's right, austerity. The more money there is, the poorer you are -

REJ:- Yes. The richer we are, the poorer I must be. er -

2ea:- You're doing well. We've never had you so good -

REJ:- Do some more basics -

2ea:- Ok. If your country is 5% of the market, how much democracy do you have? -

REJ:- 95%? 105%? -

2ea:- Pretty close! It's 5%. Democracy is the opiate of the masses. Free tradem trade freedom. If you try to fuck the market -

REJ:- Yes. What? IMFucked? -

2ea:- There is no such thing as building society. How is the IMF run? -

REJ:- You're supposed to tell me, and I watch the television -

2ea:- Wel, it's one dollar one vote. Now what could be fairer? -

REJ:- Oooh! that's ace! You could buy the running of a poor country and make it grow coffee while they starved! -

2ea:- Fairtrade, chwarae teg. 'South Korea is now run by the US treasury' -

REJ:- Who said that? -

2ea:- A treasurer. Somewhere. That one was tigers, not coffee btw -

REJ:- Wel, let's not bother with any obvious slavery in the majority world nonsense - especially with the passing of Jobs -

2ea:- We see you're ahead of 4 billion in the rich list -

REJ:- Nothing to do with me -

2ea:- If you're not part of the answer, you're part of the cliche. Oooh! let's do slogans. Maybe chants too. Perhaps a rain dance - I mean protest march -

REJ:- Look we're only trying to achieve what the most retarded tribe achieved 50,000 years ago. But with trinkets and less intermittent medicine. And perhaps not the unfortunate out-group anthropophagia -

2ea:- The superstimuli of fickle trinkets brought down the Berlin Wall. That and David Hasselhoff singing 'freedom'. Fashion can't be central-planned -

REJ:- Down the revolution! -

2ea:- Pitchforks or BACS transfer! -

REJ:- Yes I believe we did that in 'the loony lotto'. When we noticed the difference between private and public wealth. And that there was enough private wealth in the UK to give each household a million pounds, in real terms. Albeit parasitic on the slavery of other nations to give the currency value, and leading to infantilism as per Saudi etc. -

2ea:- Or you could just tax the top 10% by 25% and wipe out the national debt overnight. They could repay it after they were dead. etc. -

REJ:- Ah yes, the wealth creators seeintro. But turkeys don't vote for Christmas! -

2ea:- They do if they get presents instead of death. Even though death is the one event at which you're guaranteed not to be present. They're most in favour of it because it would make them richer. But we're being too subtle. Remember who's reading. Only the very intelligent ones will get it -

REJ:- Such crass psychology. Besides that's just one country. We were doing the world. The world doesn't revolve around crass psychology -

2ea:- Some countries are as big as the world once was! In fact, all of them. What can work for one country can work for the world. We like work, it's play -

REJ:- Shall we pretend the audience, both of them, have read Marx and spotted where he went wrong? I mean on surplus value and dialectical materialism, not just psychology -

2ea:- No just about it. If you get two monkeys, and give one more nuts, the nutless one riots or depresses, dying younger either way. Maktub. In or out it goes -

REJ:- I've never seen a monkey give birth to an economist -

2ea:- er...yes. You know, when we were young, all this used to be trees -

REJ:- What happened? -

2ea:- They were pulped to make conservation posters -

REJ:- You're pro recycling jokes anyway -

2ea:- Anyway all this was trees. Yes. Every year there was growth -

REJ:- Wagner -

2ea:- Every year there was growth as each wanted to be taller than the other -

REJ:- I think humans are a lot bit more cleverer than what is trees are is -

2ea:- The treemerican dream. The trunks were pointless. Bid up away like houses. I think I'll call them rents. When I write it as a fairy story allegory for children -

REJ:- epublished of course? -

2ea:- No, no, made in China. Printed on pandas. Now in the dark, far below the canopy, fuck all trickles down apart from the dream. Did you know, Richard, people would rather pay to be poor with a chance of being rich, than -

REJ:- There's a fruit machine in my pub -

2ea:- Let's forget centrally planned then. It can be effective, but never efficient. Now capitalism can be more efficiently destructive too -

REJ:- You're trying very hard not to say 'third way' -

2ea:- No one likes him. That meme's globalized alright -

REJ:- Do the bit about the point when the IMF first achieved taking more money from the third world than it was putting in. That's quite funny. Do the world bank too. Do the private banks. Do the -

2ea:- There's no need, Richard, no need at all. They're auto-didacts, with the information a click away. It is unlikely they will be distracted by pornography and online poker -

REJ:- You missed a joke there -

2ea:- We're homophonic -

REJ:- *click!* Goodness Iesu Mawr me! That's a double dip if ever I saw two -

2ea:- Hmmm. Wel, we'll do the solutions anyway. First, restate the problem clearly. With the clarity of the sociopath. You'll find sociopaths are best at business -

REJ:- I doubt I will, because I'm not looking. In fact you could say I'm fiddling while -

2ea:- Now we don't traditionally agree because of one reason. Two reasons. One reason. Two reasons -

REJ:- ffs -

2ea:- We mean at the macro of course. Micro takes care of itself. Macro macro macro micro -

REJ:- macro -

2ea:- Yes it's an art. So stand back and look at the painting. Perhaps not Lovelock's -

REJ:- Get on with it. In the long run we're all dead. Traditionally -

2ea:- Yes that's the one. The arbitrary stop to the iterations of the models. The other is the models fail since the participeople are rounded off to discrete particles. And weather prediction fails in days -

REJ:- But climate is mere measurement. The clouds could be periodically seeded. Say every forty years -

2ea:- Not while there are 70 money harbours. etc. Like a river flows, surely to the sea -

REJ:- Some things....aren't meant to be. But I can't help falling in love with me -

2ea:- Love is nothing to Bjorn Borg. The largest Sovereign is always going to be smaller than all the sovereigns in the world. While you have artificial Sovereign ships, the titanic bail-outs will always fail, since there is always more sea -

REJ:- It's a race to the bottom! -

2ea:- Quentin Crisp. Yes transnational remerge towards monopoly, and become bigger than nations -

REJ:- I didn't vote for that -

2ea:- Do not pass Go. Voting is very silly. You can vote for cuts or cuts. I hope you haven't fallen for that. Perhaps remove the telescreen -

REJ:- Daisycutter. I can see Wikileeks boy in orange somehow -

2ea:- Now as you can't see a yellow child ingesting lead, it doesn't register -

REJ:- On the Jewish piano! -

2ea:- Ah yes, race. To the bottom. Black bottom, the nigger's got 'em. Did you know half of the black bottoms in britain are now unemployed? -

REJ:- The hot sun makes them lazy -

2ea:- Tings that you li'ble to read in de bible, they ain't necessarily so. Apart from scapegoating -

REJ:- But what if nice people, who do typing, and proper jobs like that, became unemployed? Then it would be serious -

2ea:- Facebook frenzy! Don't worry til they start locking people up for typing -

REJ:- Are you going to do the solutions, or just keep highlighting the problems? -

2ea:- Wel, we wouldnt start from here. But if we had to -

REJ:- In your own time -

2ea:- The light is the first thing to high. Let the shrubs see the light. Peep! Peep! -

REJ:- No, do it properly. Don't be turning into him -

2ea:- Ok. To reiterate, wealth:popn is greater than ever. Malthus is wrong again. Now since technology is exponential, he's going to get wronger at a faster rate. There's a ridiculous amount of jam tomorrow coming. But let's solve it anyway, since it's trivial and you're bored -

REJ:- I'll give you 5 more minutes -

2ea:- I'll take 3. Now we said capitalism was more efficient. And more in tune with everyone being dull as fuck. That saves time. Let's not educate, the software's already written. Now people are as iron filings, and positively magnetropic. It doesn't matter if they think they aren't. There are only 7 people in the world, copied a billion times, still all the copies would fit in a third of Wales. Micro-management is auto-delegated to the mind-vehicles. All markets are rigged, currently by oligarchs. Just change the magnets. All magnets are human-made and thus mutable. By humans -

REJ:- That's 2 minutes! -

2ea:- Split the word capitalism. Remove destructive, keep constructive. Global means global. Freetrade goods & services, stem capital flow. Evaporate hot money. Set transaction tax at the fractional to cancel arbitrage and currency speculation. Remove FPI, keep FDI. Remove rents. Set intellectual property rights to ten years for tech transfer to majority world. And to annoy Cliff Richard. Establish global central bank
a la Keynes. Get your spirit level. It's a modest proposal -

REJ:- No, you took 4 minutes -

2ea:- Whodunnit btw? -

REJ:- No one yet.

Saturday, 3 March 2012

Pome for the day

Private healthcare argument, Elvis Preseli, once said 'something to do, something to look forward to, someone to love'. Wel, that's nice, but the question was why are you wearing a turban. What is little known about the tardis-suited evapotranspirator is that he was a keen amateur dendrosophogeologist. And here, straight from the money-filing cabinet @ RCA, I mean recently discovered in an abandoned salt-mine, we see his light-minded musings in all their glory, taken from the 1975 album 'So that's the why they didn't release it'. Take it away, Elvis Preseli! -

What's it like to be a fly?
Faster than the compound lie?
Years in days and months in hours
Offspring coiled explosion flowers

What's it like to be a tree?
Thirsting, searching, sunlight see?
Drink the World through tangled straw
Watching after and before

What's it like to be a me?
Rocks expressed as person be?
Knowledge after thought confusing
Ultimately but amusing